1tripz1

Wow, cant believe my last post was 27 days ago? 27?!?!!?

Looks like what I was waiting for in my last post is not going to happen. Since then I had made good progress, so I am not TOO upset, although I am definitely disappointed. Analogy time.

I feel as though I am walking uphill. This hill is steep and therefore I am tired. Because of my withered state, I am unsure how long there is left to go. All I know is at the top of the hill, there are several paths. I know that, at least 5, lead to some sort of major happiness. The others are overgrown and currently inaccessible. At the end of these paths there is a steep drop, a valley which I long for. However, there is a small road that loads past all this. I can see, even through tired eyes, this road goes on, and on. I do not want to hit that road.

I do not like waiting. I feel like the world has stopped spinning right now. I have so much passion, energy, creativity and motivation inside of me waiting to get out.

Just watched Ip Man. Donnie Yen has always been a favourite of mine and this film was particularly interesting because he practices Wing Chun, something a friend is doing. I am really desperate to start martial arts but it is an expensive hobby, one I can't do before I'm working. I was set on doing Aikido, but I have now started thinking about Wing Chun.

Im getting into a lot of new music, but don't have the time to listen to it. Scrap that, I have all the time in the world, but no reason to listen to it. I have never been able to just listen to music, I need to be doing something. At the moment all I want to do is travel to, play and travel home from poker. When doing that I get through one or two albums a night and really broaden my horizons with music. I am desperate to play live poker now. I have been playing on the internet quite a bit, but its not the same. Poker is as much about the atmosphere as the game for me, so live will always be key.

Wow, is this a real blog? Seems like it. I feel like I am at the beginning of a really fulfilling time of my life, so Im ready to talk again. Feels good actually.

Tomorrow I play my first squash league match.

Has been the question a lot of people have been asking. The few die hard readers of mine have complained about me not doing my usual long posts about the crazy thing that is my life. Well to be honest I have been pretty boring as of late (apart from the WSOP trip in the updates below), just getting my head down and working hard.

I have spent some time reading some of my better blog posts from the end of last year, just after I graduated, where everything was unclear and exciting. Im starting to feel like that again.

So I haven't felt like blogging still. Things are going crazy, but I'm still not that happy. Hoping that will change soon. Just to keep a log of what I've been doing I'm going to post all my recent twitter updates since my last blog. Should be interesting.

In an 80's club. People going mental as if every other generic club doesn't play this crap. British public make me sad.
5:20 PM Oct 3rd from TwitterBerry
Watching Ross Kemp Kenya special. He is (and his crew are) mental!
4:17 PM Oct 2nd from TwitterBerry
So nice to be back home. Quiet streets ftw.
1:03 PM Oct 1st from TwitterBerry
GG Markus, 5th for £200k.
11:55 AM Oct 1st from TwitterBerry
Its all over. I'm going home.
4:45 AM Oct 1st from TwitterBerry
This is Epic. It's 6:10am, I am wasted from well deserved, but obv premature partying. Waiting on some huge phone calls. No sleep tonight.
10:11 PM Sep 30th from web
Getting punched in the face by ftp at the absolute last minute. GREAT. Diregard my last update? Maybe :(
7:32 PM Sep 30th from TwitterBerry
I just signed one of the WSOPE final tablists. Me. Me. Me. That is big money. Root for Markus Ristola. If he wins I will buy you a car.
5:37 PM Sep 30th from TwitterBerry
At the Radison with Layne Flack and Scotty Nguyen, baby!
3:01 PM Sep 30th from TwitterBerry
Railing my guy Craig at feature table. Playing against Negreanu, Brunson, Eric Liu, Praz Bansi, Barry Shulman and Teddy Sheringham.
10:27 AM Sep 30th from TwitterBerry
Even though not one of my players, how sick would it be if Sheringham won? Railing him now on feature table.
5:30 AM Sep 30th from TwitterBerry
Akenhead short and shoving loads, winning chips back.
4:53 AM Sep 30th from TwitterBerry
PLEASE root for Craig Burgess, Michael Fasco and Arnaud Mattern to make the final table of WSOPE tonight.
2:27 AM Sep 30th from web
@sethyoung http;//bring.your.clubs.to.london.com
5:54 PM Sep 29th from TwitterBerry in reply to sethyoung
http://twitpic.com/jmmab Pokerstars media tournament in the amazing crystal room at the dorchester, welcoming arnaud mattern to the team.
11:57 AM Sep 29th from TwitterBerry
Hot waffles in Ls Sq before going back to work. Now have access all areas in thw venue. NICE.
4:52 AM Sep 29th from TwitterBerry
@sethyoung couldn't find one :( show me where in a couple of days!
4:30 PM Sep 28th from TwitterBerry in reply to sethyoung
Railing kenna james, michael binger and jeff madsen playing 10/20 horse on the terrace at the empire!
3:50 PM Sep 28th from TwitterBerry
Wandring round chinatonw trying to find layne flack some cuban cigars. Am failing.
2:24 PM Sep 28th from TwitterBerry
Sweet and sour prawns at fulushou in the Empire are definitely the best I've ever had.
12:15 PM Sep 28th from TwitterBerry
Long day. Enjoying some quiet time outside in the cool air with some ambient in my ears. 24hr shops rule.
8:10 PM Sep 27th from TwitterBerry
http://twitpic.com/jf9p0 Annette, Sam and Daniel at feature table.
4:05 PM Sep 27th from TwitterBerry
Railing wsope main event. Sam Trickett on feature table with Obrestad, Negreanu, Greenstein, Ferguson. Gl Sam!
9:10 AM Sep 27th from TwitterBerry
@sethyoung see you there mate! where you staying?
5:50 PM Sep 26th from TwitterBerry in reply to sethyoung
@ToddBrunson 25/50/100 NLHE at the Barracuda. call me on +44 7793 393 585 if you want a seat!
5:48 PM Sep 25th from TwitterBerry in reply to ToddBrunson
I see a banksy on the way to london.
7:35 AM Sep 25th from TwitterBerry
Five minute chat with Doyle about mixed games and why RAZZ is the best. So chuffed to have the chance to speak to him, what a quality guy.
10:56 AM Sep 23rd from TwitterBerry
At the Dorchester, now this is 5 star!
6:35 AM Sep 23rd from TwitterBerry
@sethyoung gonna be there the whole time mate, hit me up!
1:43 PM Sep 22nd from TwitterBerry in reply to sethyoung
Still at home with hell cold. Wanna be back big pimpin' in london.
3:24 PM Sep 21st from TwitterBerry
Slapped by Devilfish and railing high(ish) PLO with Huck Seed, Layne Flack, Jeff Madsen. Best food ever at Barracuda. Pretty sick night!
7:23 PM Sep 19th from TwitterBerry
Chilling with some shisha on Edgeware road before heading back to the barracuda.
10:05 AM Sep 18th from TwitterBerry
Found £20 on floor of hotel. Already up on the trip without even gambling!
5:26 AM Sep 18th from TwitterBerry
At the WSOPE Betfair open party, pretty empty but open bar so good times!
3:32 PM Sep 17th from TwitterBerry
Arrived at the Hilton Metropole, waiting to check in, raelly nice lobby though!
12:47 PM Sep 17th from TwitterBerry
getting ready for 3 weeks in London to host our private gaming club for WSOPE/EPT. Launch party Sat night, message me if you want to come!
9:44 AM Sep 17th from web
@sethyoung LOLERSKATE
2:27 PM Sep 15th from TwitterBerry in reply to sethyoung
Rapping with my taxi driver about needy women. UK cab drivers are awesome.
7:03 PM Sep 11th from TwitterBerry
http://twitpic.com/hcjf8 Ouch...
1:23 PM Sep 11th from TwitterBerry
9 holes before dark fails again.
11:01 AM Sep 10th from TwitterBerry
Episdoe 1 of late night poker about to start on channel 4,
4:36 PM Sep 8th from TwitterBerry
@sethyoung sleeping on the floor?
3:00 PM Sep 8th from TwitterBerry in reply to sethyoung
Was whizzed around London in a Bentley GTC. What a sick car!
1:11 PM Sep 7th from TwitterBerry
Wowsa, autumn is definitely on its way, really cold breeze. Glad I'm wearing shorts with a polo shirt and have no jumper then.
10:34 AM Sep 6th from TwitterBerry
I was going to try and play 9 holes before it got dark but the course is busier than a saturday morning, grrr
10:06 AM Sep 6th from TwitterBerry
@Annette_15 glglglglgl
5:34 PM Sep 5th from TwitterBerry in reply to Annette_15
Thinks of USP's in his sleep.
5:33 PM Sep 5th from TwitterBerry
@BLUFFdotcom do that ALL the time. write half the post, lose steam on the counter arguement i was about to make and cancel it.
3:50 PM Sep 1st from TwitterBerry in reply to BLUFFdotcom
@sethyoung how long? hit me up on msn when you have the chance!
3:48 PM Sep 1st from TwitterBerry in reply to sethyoung
http://twitpic.com/fz1qu I wasn't lying!
7:41 AM Aug 31st from TwitterBerry
Just bought a massive black and white picture of Dolph Lundgren for 50p. Universal Soldier fans unite!
3:56 AM Aug 31st from TwitterBerry
http://twitpic.com/fyh8y The british are coming! What a field full of absolute crap.
2:52 AM Aug 31st from TwitterBerry
Helping my gran do a car boot sale. The punters swarm you as soon as you arrive. How stupidly british.
2:31 AM Aug 31st from TwitterBerry
About to play Metallica guitar hero for the first time. Expert? Unlikely!
1:42 PM Aug 30th from TwitterBerry
My eyes are sore after a long day infront of the computer. Maybe these will help, anyone tried them? http://bit.ly/4peAp
11:13 AM Aug 30th from web
@Annette_15 congrats!
11:58 AM Aug 29th from TwitterBerry in reply to Annette_15
Milkman, safe. Taxi, expensive. Driving past the festival, messy.
8:57 PM Aug 28th from TwitterBerry
Wonders if his blackberry battery will last till he can find a taxi. Its flashing, plus I am fucking lost. Why am I out walking right now?
8:48 PM Aug 28th from TwitterBerry
Having a pretty insane a surreal night. Can't really describe it but its fun!
4:02 PM Aug 28th from TwitterBerry
Very productive day for Poker Icons. Lots of new exciting projects. Wishing Sam and Annette all the best on Late Ningh Poker.
10:58 AM Aug 28th from web
I suck at video editing so much. Oh cool I have lots of (voluntary and probably free) video editing to do.
4:11 PM Aug 27th from web
@Annette_15 congrats! shame you beat another poker icons player though!
5:57 AM Aug 26th from TwitterBerry in reply to Annette_15
Off to London for a meeting with the Barracuda club, big things in the pipeline...watch this space!
12:47 AM Aug 26th from TwitterBerry
Venetian Snares makes me jealous, http://bit.ly/2AV2lc
3:25 PM Aug 22nd from web
@glen_richardson that is a very imprssive distance, how many stops did yo take?!
6:51 PM Aug 21st from TwitterBerry in reply to glen_richardson
@glen_richardson at least Dave bought a coffee!
1:07 PM Aug 21st from TwitterBerry in reply to glen_richardson
just mended my apple wireless keyboard with a piece of tinfoil. Technology ...
6:28 AM Aug 21st from web
Dusting off the slammin vinyl and united dance tapes to drive my nans estate to the tip!
3:42 AM Aug 21st from TwitterBerry
@TexDolly yes to both questions.
2:40 PM Aug 18th from TwitterBerry in reply to TexDolly
@BLUFFdotcom What is your screen name on FTP?
5:42 PM Aug 16th from web
BBQ in the courtyard at 1:22am!
5:28 PM Aug 14th from TwitterBerry
http://twitpic.com/dse72 Me and Bepe!
4:43 PM Aug 13th from TwitterBerry
http://twitpic.com/ds3nv Me and Mr Gold, nice and drunk at the Empire!
3:33 PM Aug 13th from TwitterBerry
Tickets to the Jamie Gold Charity Tournament tonight at the Empire for £250 (was £500). More info: http://bit.ly/XccdJ call me 07793393585
7:59 AM Aug 13th from TwitterBerry

I'm still here. Decided its not a great idea for me to blog right now. Need to get things sorted before I do.

Another week has passed. Have I achieved much? Not particularly. Some other big things have crept up, but how long it will take for something to happen is anyones guess.

Im starting to lose a bit of hope now, and thats really worrying.

Been another pretty good week, in that were making some more great contacts with some big things in the pipeline. I have a business call tomorrow that could be a decent potential earner which would be instant, so landing that deal will be great.

Other than that squash and eating well is going great, im feeling really healthy which is brilliant. My golf game has fallen apart though, so having a lesson on Tuesday.

Im also really getting into Twitter now my Blackberry is up and running. Its actually great fun.

I've also not been drinking at all as it feels so hollow when I do. Need something to celebrate and to feel a bit more relaxed before I do again.

As you can see im still not quite ready to blog properly, but soon soon. Things are definitely moving forwards at a faster pace again and Im feeling slightly more alive because of it.

Think are looking slightly up. Gone from having a couple of quiet weeks to being pretty busy with stuff. Got some more potential big things in the pipeline, the only problem being they will take so long to mature if they ever do. Oh well, I feel really motivated right now. Its a nice feeling! Im still eating pretty good and exercising lots and can certainly feel the difference. I have also got right back on my TV show idea as im CERTAIN it would be a success. Feels cool to have a uni style project to complete, and I shall do to the highest standards.

Meh. Think are so stressful right now, Im really not having fun. I want to be somewhere else, enjoying my life. Im playing lots of sport and eating really, really well which is helping a lot. I think if it wasn't for that I would be in a terrible state.

The next week or so Is very important. Lots of big decisions to think about.

Was looking at some older posts which reminded me that I started calling each post by the name of song I was currently listening too, so will continue doing that. Listening to a whole mix right now, so gonna put the name of the DJ instead.

Went to Bristol again this weekend. Such an amazing place, so much more cultured. Saw the Banksy exhibition, what an incredible artist.

Poker Icons stuff is slow, but still moving forwards. I have another Idea I think could be pretty big, so going to start exploring that this week.

Boring. End.

Just a small update to keep things current. Oh the days when I poured my life out in this blog. It may happen again.

Poker Icons is going really, really well. I signed my first big deal and it feels great. Its not moving quite as fast as id hoped, but its still moving.

Played about 2 hours poker since the last blog. I still know what im doing. Im still bored of the micro stakes. Im still not willing to put the time in to move up.

Still not producing any music, but the urge is really, really back. Might work on that this week.

Getting back to being fairly healthy. Lots of fruit and early(ish) nights are becoming routine again and im really enjoying playing squash.

Sent my Ban-0-matic for repair finally and when thats back I will be playing much more golf.

Thats about it for now.

How the weeks are flying by!

Am making a lot of progress with Poker Icons. Seems like every couple of days Im adding a new potential deal to the lists, with one being very close to closing. We have also taken on a new person in the office, meaning we will be a three man team. This guy is a project manager, so has excellent organisation skills, something myself and Glen lack somewhat. Really looking forward to him working with us, going to take a lot of pressure off.

Apart from that though, nothing else is really going on. Played squash today in my search for a high intensity activity. My figure is horrible at the moment and I really need to do something about it, so playing that game a few times a week will really help. Its is exhausting, but the time flies by.

Played a little poker recently, but not much. That being said, the games I have played were just social games at friends houses and pubs and I beat them up pretty good. Still got it.

I might have an early night now just before the sun sets, dusk is really beautiful.

Annoying that I can only be bothered to blog once a week now. My life feels like its progressing week by week instead of day by day. Thats quite weird, and time is going too quick.

Pokericons is going really well. Im running into it head first trying to set up deals myself. I have 3 on the tables and for some reason closing one feels like its going to be one of the greatest achievements Ive made.

Today I took part in a 13 mile charity walk, raising money for the Hospice my Grandfather spent his last days in. They did such a great job so it was nice to give something back. Thanks to everyone who sponsored me, it really does mean a lot. It was also good to honor my Grandfather and even though I was tired towards the end, there was no way I was stopping. I hope to retain that feeling. My legs are pretty sore now, the walk was beautiful but unrelenting at some points.

Personal life is pretty crap as always and it seems like everyones is bad right now. I want to try and help everyone and be a friend to a lot of people, but I don't have a lot to give right now. Im worried that im going to offend people who have been making genuine effort to be personal with me, but I just don't have it in me.

Music has really started hitting me once again. I did my first music review in months the other day and it wasn't easy. It was one of many life hurdles that I have developed recently, so was good to push through it. I am now feeling creative again and am listening to lots of great music, ready to write reviews and write music once again. I still feel like I have a lot of talent, but really my life goal is to just have one release, which is picked up by a small label and has a few cult followers. That's all I want.

So yeah, things are moving, but slowly. Im in a much better place than I was been recently. I saw my old Plug N Play work colleagues the other day who all commented on how well I look, which was a really positive thing for me. Have had some good social gatherings recently, which has helped me a lot.

Thats about it for now. When Im enjoying life a bit mroe I will start blogging more regularly. For anyone who still reads this, or for when I come back to this, you will probably have to wait another week for another update.

Out.

Well, 2 weeks since my last update, probably my longest gap yet! I guess that right now im not loving life, so why would I want to document it. Im working hard though, and the last couple of weeks were definitely eventful.

We went to Cannes to hang out and help Jamie Gold at his charity event. Was amazing spending time with a world champ, even one as controversial as Jamie. He is a really nice chap and has done so much for charity, much more than people realise. The event went well even if I was exhausted, I tried sleeping experiments that didn't work.

I have been getting really back into poker recently and have enjoyed some success multi-tabling PLO online, learning the game, and playing live. Have had some great (and very long) mixed cash game sessions round Glens house and the last one I really held my own against the better players now im getting back into the swing of the game. Might go round there tonight as they have a full ring NL game going on, which I dont find too challenging.

I am however quite hungover after partying all night in London at a friends house will all my old uni mates. Was quality seeing them again. I dont play that well when im hungover, but then again games dont run that often, so I will probably go and see how I get on. If I tilt I will leave.

Music wise I have not been doing much. Its a shame, but unfortunately its not my priority right now. I dont feel pressured to do it as I know that when my living situation is better and my mind is clearer I can start being creative again.


Thats about it for now.

I've probably done a blog like this before. I have so many extreme up's and down's going on in my life right now I feel like its tearing my brain apart. Im finding this blog extremely hard to write as all I want to write is negative stuff. At one point this blog provided a great release for my feelings, but laying them out makes me realise them more.

What I wanted as being over in the last post is now over. Things feel really different, but in a good way. Im going to really miss the person gone, but this also feels a new beginning in my life. Its horrible to admit that, but thats not down to this person, yet how things have panned out for me over the last few years.

I lost the office job, but am hoping im about close enough with Poker Icons to not look for another one. Have got another pretty big, albeit one off, writing job with the possibility of more with Betfair again, so will hopefully supplement my income with that again. I enjoyed working with peoeple every day, but now I have some direction in life I feel the benefits of working shorter hours from home are necessary.

So heres to the future! Im looking forward to what might be ahead. I feel guilty with the excited feelings im happy, but I know that everyone would want me to have them. And in doing thing I will hopefully make everyone proud, which Is a great comfort for me.

Excited!

I am having one of the toughest times of my life right now. I wont go into it too much, but one of the most important people in my life is about to leave me. This is the way it is meant to be, and for that i'm very happy. I just wish it could be over and that everyone could stop suffering. I look forward to everyones peace.

Yes, I am starting to become Mr Sample. My ears are becoming very fine tuned to hearing something that would work well in a song. This weekend I have been recording stuff and cutting it up ready to be used in a track. The problem is getting around to actually making songs out of it.

Have had a bit of an epiphany though. I want to do all this recorded stuff to sample etc etc, but maybe first I need to do something a bit more simple to gain some reputation? I think that the best results im going to come up with is having people WANT to work with me. I mean if we looks back at Squarepushers catalogue he made amazing music just with samples before he had the pleasure of working with a drummer.

So for now im going to simplify my ideas and utilize whats at my disposal, not what I want to be.

So I can finally announce the big news:

http://bit.ly/rH9J

Really excited about this and we have a lot of stuff in the pipelines. Dont really feel like going into it all now, but will do soon!

Playing a dealers choice cash game tonight which should be interesting and might go to London later on to see one of our new clients.

Went to Bristol last night too see one of my best mates and had a great time. Bristol is so different than Reading, it has a lot more culture and is a lot more relaxed with things. There is Graffiti everywhere and the UK's most famous artists, Bansky, is also from the area and I was a couple of his original pieces. My phone was on the blink with no flash so couldn't get too many pics, but here are a couple.





Poker wise I have not been playing much, instead concentrating on the new venture. Very close to announcing it now and I am very exciting.

Other than that things are still pretty boring. Had a couple of other rejection but am going to put all applying on hold to put my full effort into the new venture. If that falls through (it doesn't look like it will but im not getting my hopes up juuuuust incase) then I really dont know what im going to do with myself.